There are around 80 fighters on the Ultimate roster (a little more or a little less depending who you ask) and they're not all made equal. And no, I'm not talking about their abilities. I'm talking about their appearance.
If you're part of any Super Smash Bros. group, one — I'm sorry. But two, you've probably seen players discussing who is the hottest Smash character. Who has the biggest booba? Which princess has the best feet? Which swordie has the best abs? Well, guess what — I'M SICK OF IT! It's time to talk about which character is the ugliest.
Why? No real reason.
I'm sorry but Dr. Mario is ugly. His soulless eyes with those bright blue rings just haunt me. He looks like a possessed smart device for your home. His mustache is just terrible. But you're probably wondering, "Okay, well Mario is butt ugly, fat, and short too." Yeah, but does he wear a creepy trench coat? Does Mario look like the type of guy who would pay to torture someone in a Hostel movie? No, but Dr. Mario does.
I debated adding Ganondorf because it's just too obvious but to deny that he's hideous would just be a lie. Ganondorf is ugly. His vomit-colored skin already makes people uncomfortable since he looks like he has 10 days to live. He looks like he's suffering. He looks like you'd catch a fatal disease if you go near him. His facial features are just not in proportion, with a comically large nose and lack of chin. No amount of muscles will save him from being ugly.
Surprise, Wario is ugly as hell. His color scheme is just awful, with his unsightly purple overalls and mustard yellow shirt. His cringe green shoes with pointed toes are just god awful and would land him on the cover of any of those trashy magazines that blabs about "worst dressed." His bulbous pink nose is a different color from the rest of his pale, sinewy face. His eyebrows and mustache are so severe. And his teeth... Why are they so big? What dentist allowed these implants? But yes, it doesn't help that he smells like rotten eggs.
Wii Fit Trainer
This is probably a bit more surprising. Yes, they are conventionally attractive. They are fit and have generic facial features that people find appealing. Sure. But their lack of color and features terrifies me. Wii Fit Trainer looks like an unfinished human. A ghost. A demonic force that is hell-bent on using meditation to brainwash their victims into joining some cult. I just hate seeing their unmoving lips while simultaneously hearing "Let's stretch those legs."
I can see why Peach doesn't want to be his mom.
Yeesh. Look at those soulless faces. Featureless. No nose. Dead eyes. Ice Climbers are a nightmare. Being trapped in their grasp would be worse than any other form of torture. The suffering and pain would be unimaginable. Getting curb stomped by their spiky snow boots would almost be welcomed just to never have to see them again.
Okay, they have a nose but at what cost?
Incineroar is basically the foremost furry. This is the last furry you battle as you make your way through some type of twisted furry-only fighting gauntlet of your nightmares. I honestly imagine that he's the type of furry that has a zipper on his fursuit. You just can't see it because of the fire belt, which he keeps disgustingly thrusting around. His toothy face with his smug smile is just upsetting. His grunting is off-putting. Incineroar is a horrible Pokemon design — who wants a literal man as their fighting slave encaptured in a ball? So. Effing. Creepy.
Esports writer and editor with a passion for creating unique content for the gaming community.